Ramblings of a New Mommy: Stop the Show, Stop the Comparisons, Let’s Be Authentic


Have you ever scrolled through social media to find the ever-so-perfectly-posed picture? Flawless skin, immaculate home, cute matching outfits with the kiddos, Starbucks in hand…

Sometimes I tell myself “I will never have my life together like that…” as I sit on the couch, stuffing my pie hole with cookies, wearing the same outfit for the second (maybe third…) day in a row (you better believe that hair is greasy), and my baby laying adorably there on the floor blowing snot bubbles all over her face.

But then I begin to wonder and ask myself, “Is that real life…like…does that actually happen?” It takes me a moment before I realize that most people likely tend to show the sweet…the pretty…and perhaps leave out the ugly and the struggle.

In today’s society with the ever-increasing presence of social media, I feel a rising pressure to be the perfect mother, to show the world that I have my *you know what* together… As a new mom, I make constant comparisons which leads to some very serious mom guilt (thanks PPD). I sit there and compare MY life to my PERCEIVED ideas of what OTHERS’ lives look like.

Where in the world does that leave me?

It leaves me missing out on the little, ordinary, most wonderful things going on around me, and taking for granted this most amazing life that I have been blessed with. There is no other more perfect mommy for my Arlo girl than me and I need to grant myself the privilege to rejoice in all that this new life has to offer (the good, the bad, and the ugly).

She is not going to remember my attempts at getting that perfect picture or keeping the house spotless… she’s going to remember that I was THERE and that I was always trying my best.

In showing the “world” the filtered, perfectly perfect moments, we lean further from sharing the authentic life and experience. Being authentic means you are being true to your own personality and values despite the pressure to act otherwise. You are being honest with yourself and others, and your actions align with your values. What happens when we perpetually live in a state where we only show the lovely?

We need to stop putting on a show. We need to stop comparing our journey to others. We need to start living in the moment; capturing those IMperfectly perfect moments; sharing the real, sharing the AUTHENTIC!

Because trust me, we WANT to see it!

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Bailey is a wife, mommy, and pediatric occupational therapist. She and her husband Tyler were married in the summer of 2012 and moved to Southeastern Idaho in February of 2014 shortly after Bailey graduated with her Master’s Degree. They welcomed their beautiful daughter, Arlo Mae, in September of 2021 after 6+ years of struggling with infertility. Bailey primarily works with pediatric patients as an occupational therapist and also serves as adjunct faculty at ISU. Bailey is a homebody and enjoys spending time with family, playing with her fur baby “Thorin,” collecting rocks and gems, drinking good coffee, and eating good food.